You are Magic

“Magic (ma-jic): an extraordinary power or influence seemingly from a supernatural source”.

The attempt to define magic is difficult at best. It is used more as a word to define, than one that can be defined. The same can be said for who you are. We attempt to define ourselves, yet no adequate words exist to describe the complexity of who we are. We can describe what we look like, the type of work we do, our ethnic heritage or gender. Yet, that comes nowhere near the truth of what animates your being. You are a mystery. You are magic.

Historians, philosophers, scientist and theologians have been searching for the origins and meaning of existence since the beginning of time. Various religions have been born out of an attempt to define the indefinable. We often engage in the endless pursuit to define who, what and why we are. We measure ourselves against others and their accomplishments. We are deluged each day with media images of what is acceptable or unacceptable. There is an

ongoing quest to explain the unexplainable. You are who you are and that is ever changing. You are deliciously indescribable.

Each moment you are remade. Every morning when you open your eyes, you begin a new journey. The choices and decisions that you make- color and change “who” you are. You are an indefinable, magical being. Have you forgotten this? Have you allowed the world to take away your magic? Each time you have a thought or task and give it life- you are creating! From

preparing a meal for your family or painting a picture . Everything you do adds a different dimension to who “you” are. Life is a mystery and by accepting this fact you become one with it and are more able to maneuver through it.

Think back and remember the last time you were really “in tune” with something you wanted to accomplish. Remember how easy and enjoyable it was to put together all the pieces of the puzzle to create the final outcome? You were not anxious or the least bit concerned about what other people were thinking or doing. You were one with the energy of your creation. That same

dynamic is possible in all aspects of your life. By becoming one with the magical energy of who you are, you create.

You can also create your own limitations by putting up walls of fear and inadequacy. Embrace your power; consider what you create each and every day. If you can put together the ingredients to make an apple pie, you can use the same recipe to create anything else you desire. Create a recipe that works for you. Be in harmony with the energy of what you want to bring into your life. If you have made several attempts with no apparent success- try another way. Add or remove something from the recipe. Be in tune with the Universal force of magic.

Where is your energy at this moment? Are you focusing on life affirming activities or caught up with what someone else is doing or not doing? Is your energy directed on how to get someone else to change or do what you want him or her to do? What is the topic of most of your conversations? Think about the last conversation you had- were you sharing hopes, dreams and ideas or were you complaining about how things are not going the way you want

them to? A large percentage of our words, thoughts and energy are given to what is going on around us.

By understanding that you are a powerful, magical being- you regain the power that is wasted on things you cannot control. You cannot control another person’s emotions or actions. If someone is in your life and they are causing you distress- it is because of your choice to remain part of their life. If you are not happy with the situation you are in, it is your choice.

You are not your past. You are not what someone did to you or what was taken from you. The

events and people who are and have been in your life- served to shape “who” you are at this moment. The events of today, will further hone who you are tomorrow- and so on…

To become a truly empowered being, you have to reach down into the magical place inside of you and utilize your own power. It is not important as to what your spiritual or theological beliefs are. What is important is that you understand the fact that you are a creator. What do you want to create? Peace, harmony and joy or chaos and drama? Are you always feeling angry and frustrated? Being angry or frustrated is only beneficial if it serves to steer you another direction. Conflict can be an incredible catalyst for change if you use the energy to move. Choose to

take a different path or look at things from a different perspective. It does not matter how you do it, the important thing is that you get into a place that you want to be.

You are who you are and that is “magical”. Do not allow anything to diminish and cage your personal power. Allowing your inner self to grow and blossom is a process. Magic happens

when you leap into mystery and become that which you desire to be. Like attracts like- to manifest magic, you must be magic. Just as you cannot adequately define the mystery of life, do not attempt to define “you”. Embrace the undiscovered parts of who you are. Set out on a course to reveal the mystery that dwells within you. If you must define yourself, you are magic.

Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it.

Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749-1832)

Distractions

Curiosity always seems to get the better of me. Just like Pandora, if I see a box that I know I probably should not open- I just have to take a "peek". It is good to remember, some things are closed for a reason. For me, the biggest temptation is to look into the box labeled "the past".

In the beginning of this new spiritual path, I knew that it order to move forward- I could not retrace my past steps. Man, it is hard! I find myself missing some of the drama and often wondering "what is going on?" I also spend a lot of time thinking about the past and the events of my life that got me to where I am now.

Physically, I am alive at this moment- August 6th 2009 at 8:44 AM (CST). Yet, most of the time I live in the past. By paying attention to my thoughts- I notice how often I travel backward. There is a part of me that is stuck in some kind of weird space-time continuum. For no apparent reason I will start thinking about some random event that happened in 1981 or whatever.

Many of my reactions to events are based on past experiences. When a new situation arises that has some similar "essence" to a past event- I bring those dead memories back to life. I am like Dr. Frankenstein- always trying to give life to that which is dead and buried. I know that experience is our greatest teacher, and by embracing the wisdom learned- we grow. What stunts our growth is trying to use the same solution and applying it to all situations.

You cannot use addition to solve a subtraction equation. I realize that in many cases, that is what I am doing. I have the skill to solve the equation, but for some strange reason- I keep using the wrong formula. I think that perhaps this is out of "habit" or maybe it is just plain old laziness.

I wonder, what magical things would appear if I use the correct the solution? What would happen if I kept my thoughts and feelings focused on the present? I am reminded of the old saying "the definition of insanity is doing the same thing- yet, expecting different results". No wonder I am driving myself (and probably everyone around me) crazy!

Starting today, I will embrace this new insight. When I am tempted to resurrect the past- I will remind myself that I am no longer the same person- therefore the past is not applicable. If I continue to expect to see the same things- I will miss all of the amazing new sights that are there, if only I would open my eyes to their existence.

I must resist the temptation to look in the box that is labeled "the past". In that box are things that I prefer not to see again. Of course, there are also wonderful memories residing there and those I will always cherish. Yet, when you open a box- you cannot always control what comes out.

Personally, I do not want to give life to dead things- I choose to embrace my magic and create wonderful new experiences and opportunities. No longer will I be distracted by the scary skeletons rattling for attention.

Trusting in The Un-Seen

I know that there is something fabulous waiting for me just over the next hill. However, I cannot see it. I feel it and sense that it is there, and I am a bit anxious to get there. There is a part of me that wants to run like the wind to speed up the process, but I also know that running will just wear me out and create more anxiety.

I believe that part of the experience is summoning an inner trust and knowing. An essential part of manifesting magic, is an unyeilding belief in what cannot be seen. Attemping to "figure out" the secrets to magic- takes away the mystery and thus destroys the magic.

The real "trick" is to allow the process to unfold and not manipulate the magic to fit what we think should or should not happen. What if, by attempting to figure things out- we change the very mystical structure of what lies before us? What if there is some amazing thing waiting for me- just a few steps away and my desire to dictate what I want it to be or what it should look like, changes it from the extraordinary to the mundane?

One of the most obvious lessons I am learning on this journey is that I meddle to much. Why do I allow my thoughts, feelings and habitual questioning of everything to disturb the "force"? What if by thinking there is a monster waiting to jump out from behind a rock- creates the monster? Does dwelling on all the terrible things that "could" happen actually give them life?

I choose to believe that we live in a magical place, and we are magical beings. This is sometimes a difficult belief to maintain, as most of the world does not believe in such silly things. But, what if it is not silly at all? Are those who DO NOT believe actually the silly ones?

Does the belief in illness, create illness? The belief in poverty create poverty? The thoughts of being lost and alone- manifest lonliness and despair? And if that is true- would believing in magic cause it to manifest? Maybe I have been using my magic for ill instead of good. Perhaps it is not the world, the people, the economy causing grief and despair- only the misuse of the innate and magical power that lives within.

Today I choose the believe that there is something wonderful just up the path. I do not know what it is, yet I know it is there. I feel it's powerful presence and know that it is only waiting for my arrival. I also know, that it has always been there- I was just to blind to see it.

What waits for you that you do not choose to see? Are you blind to the magnificent Angel that stands beside you? Can you see the magic that lies within you when you look into the mirror at your own eyes? Have you accepted the grim reality that the world has told you exist? Do you believe the lies that you are nothing special? Just for today, or for only a moment- believe in magic and that something extraordinary waits for you. I know that is what I am going to do.

Traveling Alone (for a while)

I have come to realize that walking a spiritual path, opening up yourself to your magic and intuition, means that you have to walk alone (for a little while anyway). As I begin to look inward and attempt to transform myself- I realize that the person I am on the inside, is not the person that I show the world.

The person who the world "has" seen is really not who I am. The challenge is realizing that past friendships, acquaintances and business associates may no longer blend with my energy. The "universe" being the magical place that it is- has shown me in very specific ways- what is and what is not for my highest good.

It seems to me, that (almost) everyone around me has long their ever-loving minds! People are acting strange.........I see a lot of aggression, self pity, neediness and to be honest, selfishness. Was that always there? Or am I only noticing it now? Or did I always know and just did not want to admit it?

There seems to be a big "us against them" sort of energy prevalent these days. I think for the most part, people are afraid. They are afraid of losing control, so out of this fear- they huddle together- finding safety in numbers. Feeling that if they are banded together against a common foe- they have power. What they do not realize, is that- with this kind of energetic dynamic- they will begin to turn on each other. They become paranoid and suspicious. It is quite sad and a bit "nutty".

Observing this, prompts me to look at my own spirit. Do I feel that it is me against the world? Am I suspicious and UN-trusting? You bet your patootie I am! Am I selfish? Do I want people to feel sorry for me? Do I want someone to help me? Darn Tootin' I do! Am I acting a bit "nutty" myself? Do I see myself as a victim? Am I angry? yep, yep and yep.

Yet, there is another part of me that no longer wants to engage in this energy. I do not want to put out- and therefore attract this energy into my life. I know that if I shift my energy and rise above the emotions that I no longer wish to be dominant in my life........then, what shows up in my life will change. If I stop being needy and wanting people to feel sorry for me- then the people who are running that energetic dynamic will no longer be in my life. If I transmute my anger, selfishness and self pity- I will not need those mirrors any longer.

The downfall is that, at least for a little while- I might be alone. I know that many of the behaviors I engage in are unhealthy, but if I do not behave that way- I have nothing in common with most people around me. I do not want to be isolated and alone. But, if I want to make real personal and spiritual leaps- I realize that I must make some sacrifices.

I want to attract powerful, spiritual, kind, honest, healthy people into my life. In order for that to happen- I MUST hold those energies with myself. I cannot run around gossiping, exaggerating, manipulating, being angry and acting like a child and expect healthy, spiritual beings to be attracted to me.

Time to grow up! I need to be a big girl. With this decision comes consequences. Perhaps I will be without companionship for a little while. Perhaps the energy of those around me, will change as I change. Maybe fabulous new friends, acquaintances, business associates will not be far off? Whatever it is, it is........ for now, I must sail out and see what magical adventure awaits.

First Steps

Why does it seem that first steps are always the most difficult? I assume it is just the continual apprehension and questioning of "where am I going?" I keep reminding myself that I am moving and that is the most important part. Yet, it seems that I am carrying a heavy load and that is impedding my progress. Each step requires great effort.

It is time to put down some of the baggage that I seem to want to lug around with me. However, the baggage that I carry cannot be seen. It is like I am hauling around an invisible 50lb backpack. So the question is "what am I carrying?" and the only way to know, is to open up the backpack and peek inside to determine what is and is not needed.

As I unzip the backpack, there are literally hundreds of things that spill out. People, events, experiences are all jammed into this rather small container. Just like cleaning a closet, I must look at each item and ask some very important questions.

1. Is this past person/event/memory relevant to my life now? Why am I carrying it with me? Am I using it as a justification or excuse to be a victim? Does it really matter that when I was a kid someone made fun of me? Why am I holding on to "percieved" failures? Why am I lugging around an old boyfriend who I have not seen nor spoken to in over 20 years? Why does that thing that someone said in the past continue to have power over me now?
2. If I feel it is "relevant" - how am I using it now? Am I using the power and experience of the situation? Or am I using it as a "label" of identification? Do I want to wear this label? Does it represent who I am now or who I want to be? Remembering that the experience made me who I am today- does not mean that I need to continue to "be" the person who experienced it.
3. Are the people to whom I associate now enhancing my life experience or are they holding me back? Do they encourage me? Do I encourage them? Is our shared time together negative in nature?
4. What about my habits and behaviors? Am I a good friend? Do I do things for others with an open or loving heart or do I expect something in return? Am I honest or just say things that I know people want to hear? Do I agree with others merely out of a desire for acceptance or do I stand by my convictions?
4. What about all these ugly thoughts in this bag? Do I really need the anger, jealousy, resentment, anxiety and judgements?
5. Are these "things" real? Or are they just spectors/ghost from the past? Are the fears I carry real or figments of my imagination?

During this process I realize that most of what I carry with me, is utterly useless. Of course, there are things that are important to remember. However, I can remember the experience or lesson learned without bearing the weight of the entire situation. For example, I seem to have gotten involved with many people who were not a good match for me. Many of my past associations ended with negative feelings and a sense of betrayal. I can use the experience and be more careful about whom I choose to share my time, money, energy, and creativity with- but I do not have to haul the person and all the memories along on my journey.

I also realize that I must take time every so often and re-evaluate what I am taking along. For as I grow and move forward I will accumulate more events, experiences, memories and relationships. In order to keep my load light- I must take a look every so often so I do not end up with 50lbs. of garbage again. I also must be vigilant against the temptation to pick up the discarded items.

My "invisible" backpack is still there- it feels a little bit lighter. I know that there are still things that need to be unloaded- yet, I feel good that I have lightened my load just a bit. I am beginning to get excited about this new journey and cannot wait to see what lies down the path ahead of me.

I already have recieved a sign that I am on the right path. This morning while sitting on my porch drinking coffee, one of my neighbors walked by- she seldoms talks to me but today she did. She asked how I was and I asked her the same question- she replied "well, it is not always easy- but I have to keep keeping on- nothing can keep me down". I took that as a personal message for me and in turn, for you- keep keeping on.......

A Fork in the Road

As I travel down the path of life, I see a fork in the road before me. I do not know which direction to take. Right or left? At this moment they both look the same, yet I know they are not. So for now, I have just planted my butt on the ground, waiting for something to move me. I am looking for a sign, any kind of omen to help me decide which way to go. A burning bush would be great just about now.

I have been here before. Actually many times. In the past I have always just picked a path and followed it- I was much more adventurous. Now I am wary and weary. To be completely honest, I am afraid. I am scared of taking the wrong path. Frightened to move, and at the same time- frightened to sit still.

But, here is the kicker- I know there is no such thing as the wrong path. Each path we take endows us with experience. Every adventure adds a new dimension to our character. We learn to be brave and strong or perhaps we learn how to be gentle and kind. Without these experiences- we would not grow.

Growth can be painful and messy, it can be fun and exciting yet in most cases it is just wearisome. And that is the place that I find myself. I just exited out of a rather dark forest where there were many obstacles, thorns, potholes and scary monsters. The stillness of where I am now is comforting in many ways- but, I am anxious to get moving again.

So, this is my adventure- A new quest has begun. I have my backpack full of experience and my intuiton to help guide me along the way. I have to trust that my magic will get me out of any trouble or scary trolls that might be on the path ahead.

My wish is that my adventure can help you to navigate your way through life's winding road. I am ready to get up and go. As I stand I must choose a direction- and I choose to to take the path to the left. It looks the same as the path to the right, but my intution tells me turn left- and that is what I will do. I hope you will continue to walk with me on this adventure-

Ok, here I go.........

Candle in the Dark

Life is amazing if we choose to see it that way. Inside of my sadness lies an incredible beauty. The excavation of my emotions, my desires and longing are all part of a magical journey. There is nothing about our life that does not contain the element of magic with in it.

How we end up at the right place and the right time or the wrong place at the right moment. It all leads us to the deeper search with and the to the ultimate fulfillment of our destinies. Each moment, each second is an opportunity to create something, to change and evolve.

I have an aversion to mirrors. Not for reasons of vanity, but of utter confusion. Gazing into the reflection of my eyes, I see another being, another life. A life of love and beauty of unlimited possibility lies beyond the hazel coloring that the world sees. When can this mask be taken off and my true self revealed? How would I be viewed if I expressed the truth of who I am? And the bigger truth within that question is, who am I?

The grand dilemma unfolds. Already my heart and soul is wrapped in a web of almost unbearable loneliness, would by revelation of my inner most truth further alienate me from a world that is foreign to me.

During my own incredible journey through this life I have experienced much sadness,
hurt and longing. Yet I find comfort in those haunting memories. The pain compels
me ever forward to search for the ultimate freedom. The light of my soul is like a
candle in the dark, illuminating the path to liberation and understanding. Within the
veins of who I truly am flows light not blood.

My spiritual heart is larger than any physical vehicle could contain. The limitless love that flows through me longs to be shared with the world. Yet, I stay safe hiding in the shadows.
But, something urges me on to come out of the shadows and step into the light. A beautiful voice whispers in my ear, keep going, hold on, you are almost there. The key to my own freedom and my own liberation is in fully embracing each moment. To have the courage to love, to allow the fullness of life support me.

To never forget the pleasures and always remember the pain. Metamorphosis happens
in an instant, one magical second in time. To have the strength to take off my blindfold, to open myself to the magnificence of my own spiritual power. To take a risk, be daring and bold.
My heart overflows with love and the painful longing to reveal it. Yet how? How do I share myself with the world? How can I make a difference? I feel so small and limited at times, until I remember the light that pulses through my veins.

Sometimes I am paralyzed at the complexity of my own thoughts. I stumble over myself, and the various aspects of who I am. I desire to be liberated from my own fears. Ironically, in the confusion I find great clarity. The possibility of discovering the secret to my own freedom is a powerful elixir. To overcome that which binds me in my own self created prison. To sprout my angelic wings once again and fly to the sun, but unlike Icarus, my wings will not melt. They will be forged with strength and sturdiness built with precision and forethought, allowing me to fly to great heights in complete safety.

Like a raw diamond I am being honed and cut by spirit, with the intention of revealing the brilliance of each facet. The finer the cuts, the more fully the spectrum of light will dance upon the surface. Each night I cry for freedom, for change. For my soul eyes to see the truth, no longer clouded by own self imposed limitations. When the shadows begin to descend upon me, I welcome them. For in the embrace of the darkness I more clearly see the light.

Paula Picard Copyright 2003